So I'm taking a walk in the beautiful neighborhood, (it's a beautiful day for a neighbor, would you be mine? Could you be mine?) and I come upon the quiet resort of White Sulphur Springs. The bronze plaque tells me it's the oldest health springs of its sort in California, founded in 1852 and providing a healthful retreat for the wealthy San Franciscans of the day. Today, it is home of the Hoffman Process but today, it looks quite deserted. Albert and I are strolling along, he, enjoying the numerous squirrels while I am enjoying the utter lack of humans. The fantasy begins as we turn a moss-strewn bend in the road and are overpowered by the sulphuric odor. It's cool and silent and smelly...What if Anthony Bourdain and his crew were sitting in that hot tub?, after a day of shooting in the snooty Napa wine country?, enjoying a soak?, a smoke? and a heavenly cab? and what if he asked, "Would you like to join us?" It's a F A N T A S Y, OK?
The Hoffman Process turns out to be some kind of new age thing--actually called the Hoffman Quadrinity Process--by which one comes to the site, spends 8 days with other like minded people and fixes everything that is holding you back from being your perfect self. You must abstain from alcoholic beverages, non-prescription mind altering drugs and sex for the 8 days. For the process participation, the non-profit institute will charge you $3995.
Neither Anthony nor I will be attending.
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